Driving 101

So, add to the list of my moving adventures my latest project: Driving!!

Driving in India is CRAZY, I mean cuckoo bananas, psychotic, rambunctious, hysterical, unorganized, unpredictable! Everytime I would visit the motherland and watch people drive, I would be in complete awe as to how can any one ever predict what is about to happen next. It's like a roller coaster ride but with no fixed route. Just goes. Ha.

Since my move here I have been deliberately postponing my "driving lessons" secretly hoping that I will be better prepared to blend in the craziness over time. Turns out the time was a few days ago.

I have been taking driving lessons and it was my third lesson today. I remember taking driving lessons when I was 16 in Valparaiso, Indiana. There was so much attention to detail in something as simple as a driving class. We had to take hours of lectures and finally got the pleasure of taking the car out with an instructor who gave us his utmost attention while we were learning. Mr. Johnson (that was my instructor's name) took the painstaking duty to explain every traffic rule or sign or crossway that I passed as I drove so that I understood the significance of making a wrong or premature move.

Well, fast forward nine years later to my driving lesson in New Delhi and its a 180 to say the least. Of course, the cars here are manual. So aside from the fact that you need to pay more attention to the reckless, non traffic rule abiding drivers that account for 98% of the drivers on the road, there is the gear box, clutch, and the right hand side driving to pay attention to. It was amusing to me though to notice that my instructor didn't even ask for a learner's permit or even have a brief conversation about my experience with driving before he handed me the keys.

He simply put me in the drivers seat and literally threw me in traffic. Instead of explaining the rules of the road, he simply gave me 'pointers' such as "every time you see a cycle rickshaw, move over" or "if someone is in your way, just honk and push your way through". If this wasn't chaotic enough, it was hilarious when he would answer his cell phone while I was 'in class'. Being on your cell while driving is a ticketable offense in India so I would think that a driving school instructor doing it while training has got to be illegal as well. Oh well. It wasn't a brief 30 second conversation either. He took his time to make sure the person he was talking to was completely satisfied with the conversation and would occassionally turn to me to make sure I wasn't hitting a pedestrian or something.

Bottom line after my sessions so far: Nobody is obeying any traffic rules whatesoever, so you best watch your back! There is no organization in traffic rules here, its simply defensive driving ALL the time.

Watch out Dilliwallas, I'm about to join the wacky driving club!